How to Play Hard to Get with Your Crush?

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 Do you know that guys love challenges, especially when it comes to girls?

So, if you have fallen for a guy and want to grab his attention, you will have to keep the mystery alive. Now, you may ask, “How to do that?”

Well, that is exactly where playing hard to get comes into the picture. You need to play hard to get so that the guy you like becomes interested in you. Yes, you read that right!

Generally, men don’t get into a relationship with a girl who offers them everything at the beginning, even though that is exactly what they want. After all, if you give the guy you have a crush on everything they want right from the beginning, why would they even bother to chase you, right?

After chasing it and earning it, men want the reward in the end. Of course, the reward here is YOU. But if you make it too easy for them to get you, they will definitely get you and be in a relationship with you; but they will not be satisfied at heart and not give you the value you deserve. And you don’t want that, right?

So, how to play hard to keep your man’s interest in you intact?

I have shared some tried and tested tips here. Have a look!

How to Play Hard to Get?

Before I give you the tips, let me clarify one thing.

Playing hard to get DOESN’T mean that you have to pretend as if you don’t care. Because if you do that, any guy will assume that you are not interested in him, and he will move on.

Instead, playing hard means you are letting a guy pursue you while you act as if you don’t have the same feelings for him. BUT you do drop some subtle hints every now and then to make him understand that you DO like them too.

Got it?

Now let’s move on to the tips!

1. Don’t be Desperate

Don’t be Desperate

Men are strange creatures! If they like you, they will want you to like them back. BUT, if you show too much interest in them, they will get bored of you.

So, what do you need to do?

Well, I suggest playing the game and making sure that you beat them in their own game. Sound cool?

When they ask you if you are free in the evening, do not reply instantly with “Yes, sure.” Instead, just type, “Yes, just give me some time. I need to double-check something and see if I will be available or not.”

This will make him understand that you are interested, but that doesn’t mean that he is your first priority. After this, he will give more effort to be your number one.

So, girl, now you know it is not that difficult to play hard to get, right?

2. Tell Them That You Have Male Friends

No one likes competition when it comes to dating, isn’t it? And guys are no exception to it.

If you want to stir some reaction, don’t forget to mention your male friends to your crush. Mention them in such a way that they are interested in you, but you are not. And you see them just like your friends. You know, in a casual way.

You guy will get to know that he is not the only one who wants to make you their partner. Naturally, this will make him jealous, and he will do his best to be on top of your interest list.

3. Show Him That You are Happy with Your Single Status

As you are single, show it off! And yes, be proud of yourself.

Do things that you enjoy. Laugh, dance, travel, party, and have the best time of your life with your girlfriends.

Do you have any hobbies or interests that you couldn’t continue because of work or other commitments?

Then now is the time to do all those things because you will not get this time for yourself when you will get involved in a relationship.

Work hard, party harder. Do all the things you can to improve your life and take care of your health and happiness.

Did I tell you how sexy it is when a single lady is independent and knows how to make herself happy?

Take selfies wherever you go and post them on your social media. Then, when your guy sees those pictures, he will feel all the more motivated to chase you. After all, who doesn’t want to be with someone with a positive aura?

Also Read: How to Get Boys to Like You Without Talking to Them?

4. Make Him Wait for Physical Intimacy

Don’t sleep with the guy on your first date just because he is insisting. To be honest, men are always ready for sex! So you should be the one who would be making decisions here.

If he keeps on asking for it, tell him firmly that you are not ready for physical intimacy at the moment, and you need some more time to get to know him first.  And yes, don’t apologize for saying this.

If he is a good guy, he will understand you. And he will respect you for this.

He will know that you are not someone who is here just for the physical need; you are here for a serious relationship. And he needs to work hard to get your trust.

Instead of hopping into bed with him, you can give him a kiss to make him understand that you are interested in him. Like this idea?

5. Give Him not Much Attention

Give Him not Much Attention

When we love someone, we tend to want all the attention we can get from that person, isn’t it? The same is with your crush too.

The only difference is that when you give him a lot of attention, he will get bored after a certain time. The solution?

Give him attention but just enough, not more, not less. Stop yourself from giving him your undivided attention when he calls or texts you because that will make him take you for granted.

Instead, give him attention but also show that you have other important work to do too. This will make him want more.

And as a result, he will work harder to impress you so that he can get all the attention he deserves.

6. Getting Too Personal is a No-No

I know you are dying to let him all in. But darling, in this game of playing hard to get, you have to take caution!

You can show him some affection, but not all the affection in the world. Open him the door, but that doesn’t mean that you will let him jump in. remember, you are doing all these because you want to be with him in a long-term relationship. So, while approaching, you have to take each step slowly.

So, before you send him a dirty text and ask him to come over to your place, send him a flirty text first.

Before you make out while saying goodbye, hug him first. In short, all I’m asking you is to take your time. Know him first before you do physical or intimate things.

When you take it slow, it will double the fun element in your equation. You can spend time with him every day but make sure that there is space.

You need to let him miss you when you are not around. I know you want to make love to your crush, but honey, just a little wait, and you will be happy later!

7. Play Hard but Make Sure Not to Kill the Chase

I have already mentioned how men love challenges when it comes to winning a girl over, right?

But by that, I meant only a little harder challenges so they can reach you and NOT unreasonably hard challenges. They love it when they overcome a challenge and accomplish something.

This means that the moment you confess your feelings for him, he will not put in the extra effort he was putting in all this time. He will think that he has already reached his goal, so why the hard work anymore?

So don’t accept him before you know all about him. You need to know that he is not all about chasing you and making you his girlfriend. He wants to be in a long-term relationship with you. In the meantime, what you can do is show that you are interested in him too.

For example, when he sends you flowers and chocolates, you can receive them with a pretty smile on your face.

Or you can send him a beautiful “thank you” text. Or, you can even give him a friendly hug. After all, he is making all these efforts just to win you.

Just make sure that you are not making him feel like he is doing all these because it is his duty to make you feel happy. Because if he thinks that, he will no longer be interested in you, and you don’t want that, right?

The key here is to encourage him and make him know that you can be his girlfriend – someday!

8. Value Yourself First

Girl, if he thinks that it will be easy for him to get you just because he drives an expensive car, has a good job, and has six-pack abs, make him think twice!

Know that he has a successful career because he is good at what he does and has worked hard to reach where he is today. Show him that you are like him too.

You are good-looking, independent, you know exactly what you want, you work hard to reach your goal, and you don’t want to settle for anything less than you actually deserve.

So have ambitions, be proud of yourself, and be happy with your life.

This is you, a jackpot in itself. So play hard so that you can make sure he will treat you the same once you get into a relationship with him. And he should know that you will be an amazing girlfriend.

9. Play with Him

Play with Him

Let me get this clear. Do not hide from him just because you want to play hard.

Let him see you. Let him see that you are around, smiling and meeting new people, and flirting a little bit with other guys.

The catch here is to use your body language. Make him feel that you are interested in him.

So, flirt with him and attract him into your game of seduction. I know you are playing hard to get, but you need to create at least some kind of attraction so that he can dream about you and desire you.

The game that you are playing should not be all about rejection. You need to show him your lovable, sweet side too. Otherwise, he may get the wrong idea that you are not interested in him, and he will move on.

You may have heard a thousand times that the first impression is the last impression. That applies in this case also. You should not act like a rude or snobbish girl. All I’m asking you here is to behave like a woman with a class – which you already are.

If he asks for your phone number, don’t act desperate to give it to him. Instead, be reluctant at first, and then play the game as you like. After all, the field is all yours!

10. Put in Some Effort

Now that you are learning how to play hard, let me tell you something. Playing hard doesn’t mean you have to stay aloof and emotionally distant all the time.

Don’t get this wrong. That is not how this whole thing works. It doesn’t mean you have to be rude sometimes and sweet sometimes.

When your crush is chasing you, if he knows that he is going to get what he wants in the end, he will be more interested in chasing you.

But, girl, this means you need to put in at least some amount of effort too! This will keep the tension between the two of you alive and make this game more fun.

Are you ready for it?

11. There Should be Space

Did I tell you that you need to find the right balance between giving him some attention and giving him some space?

Well, yes. The key to playing hard to get is keeping the right balance. If you show him too much affection, he will start taking you for granted, and if you don’t give him at least some attention, he will think that you are not at all interested in him.


Let me make it easier for you.

When he asks you out, don’t always be available in the first place. Instead, take your time to say “yes.” And sometimes, you can tell him that you are not available as you have other more important work to do.

This will not let him take you for granted and give him a chance to miss you.

Sound good?

12. Don’t Express Your Feelings Too Early

Yes, I know you are very much in love with this guy. You want to hug him tightly and confess your feelings for him.

But, honey, not so early in the game!

If you want to play hard, you will have to make this sacrifice for the good of your future relationship that is going to happen soon.

The main point here is to let him pursue you. He should keep guessing. After all, you want to keep him on his toes, right?

Yes, you can give him mild signs sometimes that you have started liking him. And you can even flirt with him a little, but don’t go overboard with it. The only thing that you can’t do is tell him directly that you are head over heels in love with him and want to be with him for the rest of your life!


Because if you do that, there will be no point in playing hard to get. And you will be off the track.

13. Blow His Mind with Your Confidence

Blow His Mind with Your Confidence

Did I tell you how guys like girls who are independent and have a high level of confidence?

Yes. No guys want to date a girl who is not confident in herself, has issues trusting her own self, and needs the help or the assurance of others to get over their insecurities. And your crush is no exception to it.

It is okay if you have some insecurities. We all have. But that should, in no way, affect the way you talk, look, do, and overall, the person that you actually are.

Because, if that happens, you will no longer remain interesting in a guy’s eyes.

Be someone you really are. Be happy and content with your life. Pay attention to how you look, work well and be your sexiest best. Don’t waste your time worrying about the insecurities you have in life. Instead, work on them and make them your strength.

When you are confident in yourself, you share positivity. When your guy sees this quality of yours, he will be more than eager to be with you and share the awesomeness.

Walk with your head high. Don’t look down on the floor while you walk. Instead, look straight, and approach them with a friendly smile when someone comes to talk to you. After all, there is nothing better than a confident woman!

You May Also Read: 210 Cute Things to Say to Your Boyfriend to Make His Heart Melt

14. Your Schedule Should be Mysterious

Don’t let this guy know all about your everyday schedule. There should be at least some amount of mysteriousness in it.

By this, I’m not telling you to lie to him or hide all about what you are going to do that weekend. After all, no relationship should start with a lie, especially when it is a romantic relationship.

I mean that if he asks you to meet on the weekend and you cannot because you are attending a party with your girlfriends, tell him that you have other plans. Just don’t disclose what exactly the plan is. This will make him curious and keep him guessing. See, I’m not asking you to lie!

If you tell him everything you do on a daily basis, there will be no mysteriousness in you. On the contrary, he will know all about you – what you do in a day, where you are going, whom you are with, and so on.

And this is far from playing hard to get, as the guy will get the idea that you are totally into him, so you have told him your schedule.

So stay a little mysterious and make your guy wonder about your whereabouts.

15. Tell Him How You Feel on Certain Occasions

Now, don’t get me wrong. And don’t get confused.

By telling him how you feel, I’m not telling you to go and tell him that you have fallen for him. I know you are playing hard to get, and you want to keep a little bit of mystery in the relationship. So what I’m asking you here is to tell him how you feel on certain occasions.

As you love him, it will not hurt if you are being honest with him. In fact, he will feel good about it and get the energy to chase you more.

If you went out with him and had fun, let him know that you had a great time. If you love spending time with him, tell him that hanging out with him is fun. Tell him that he has a great sense of humor if he makes you laugh.

In short, whatever you like in him, you can let him know.

And please, don’t send mixed signals to him as it will confuse him. For example, telling him fun to be with one day and then not replying to his texts or not answering his calls the other day is not cool. This is not the way you play hard to get.

16. Don’t Toy with His Feelings

Let me ask you something. Do you really love this guy? Be honest.

If your answer is “yes,” then good, but if your answer is “no,” then girl, this game is not for you. I don’t support playing with someone’s feelings.

If you don’t have feelings for a guy but are still playing hard to get, that will be cruel and unnecessary. These tips are only for those girls who are really into a guy and want to be in a long-term relationship with him.

Don’t play mind games with someone just because you are single and want someone to get hooked on you. You don’t have to be this heartless.

17. Don’t Flatter Him

Do you really want to know how to play hard to get?

Then the first thing you need to do is stop yourself from feeding his ego or flattering him.

Does he boast about how rich he is and how hot he looks with his six packs? Don’t compliment him for that. Just hold a smile on your face and listen.

Don’t act in a negative way too. All I’m asking you is to have a high value for yourself. And you don’t have to stroke his ego all the time.

Let him understand that you are an independent and confident woman. You know what you are, and you are in no way going to settle for less.

Trust me. Your guy will chase you for this!

18. Don’t Wait for His Calls and Texts All Day

Don’t Wait for His Calls and Texts All Day

This is one mistake that most girls make. They give so much importance to the guys they like that they end up waiting all day for their texts and calls.

Did you know that guys can actually understand when you do that?

And when they understand this, they will stop chasing you, as they will know that you are already into him. This is far from playing hard to get.

So, it’s time that you drop your phone and make the most of your time enjoying yourself and making memories.

Live a life that you have always wanted to and make it interesting. Don’t jump to answer your crush’s calls or reply to him instantly. Take your time.

You can attend to his calls or reply to his texts when you are available. Don’t just spend all your time focusing on this guy. Go get a life. Hang out with your friends, and pursue your hobbies.

This will make you interesting and all the more desirable in his eyes.


Read More: 313 Cute Things to Say to Your Boyfriend over Text

19. Set the Boundaries

You need to learn how you can keep a balance between keeping your crush wondering and keeping him entertained.

When you start playing hard to get, make sure that you know what his actual feeling is and what he expects from you.

For example, you may find out that he gets frustrated or extremely upset when you don’t reply to their texts even after days of receiving them. In that case, you need to make sure that it doesn’t happen the next time.

After all, you are not playing this game to hurt his feelings. You are into it because you are in love with him and want to know him more before you commit to this relationship, isn’t it?

So, the next time, what you can do is keep him waiting for your reply for only a couple of hours and not days. This will give him the idea that you are interested in him, too, and he will not stop chasing you.

Playing hard doesn’t mean you have to block your crush so he can’t stay in contact with you. Rather, it means that you keep him hanging and wanting for more. But, of course, this is not at the cost of his self-worth, confidence, or his love for you.


As you learn how to play hard to get, just make sure you keep the element of mystery alive and be happy in your own world. Don’t make him your biggest priority – ever bigger than your goals in life.

Did I miss something, or is there anything else that you want to add to this list?

Let me know in the comments!

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