Are you planning to have a r this weekend? Are you looking for a way that can raise the temperature of the room, viz-a-viz, making your partner have a hearty laughing session at the same time?
How about asking him double-meaning riddles?
These riddles are a great way to create a sexy environment with your partner. They seem dirty when you ask them but have rather innocent answers – enough to give you two a fun time.
So, are you ready to show your partner a glimpse of your dirty mind?
Here comes the list of some of the naughtiest double-meaning riddles. Ask these to your husband or boyfriend and see how they roll laughing!
Dirty Double Meaning Riddles For Adults
These riddles are strictly for adults. So, read on.
Every man has me. I’m a word that begins with the letter “P,” and for me to grow, I need stimulation. What am I?
The pupils of his eye
I am dirty, I love being filled with wood, but someone only goes down on me once a year. What am I?
A fireplace.
People use their hands to go up and down me. I’m very long and very hard. What am I?
A railing
What’s the best part of your body to put into a pie?
Your teeth.
You use your hand to whack me off. The bigger I am, the louder I make people scream. What am I?
A spider
Every time I come, it’s news. I often hit your bush, but only when my aim is bad. What am I?
A newspaper delivery person.
Some people like to keep me trimmed. Others keep me long. Everywhere seems to get covered in it. What am I?
Grass
What can you find in a man’s pants that you’ll never find in a woman’s?
Pockets
The more popular you are, the more you get. You can do it by yourself, but it’s always better with someone else involved. What am I?
Email
What makes men’s voices louder than women’s?
Their antenna
I once let over 1000 different people inside me until I was ripped open by something long and hard. What am I?
The Titanic
Arnold Schwarzenegger has a big one. Donald Trump has a small one. And Seal doesn’t have one at all. What am I?
The last name
I grow in a bed, first white then red, and the plumper I get, the better women like me. What am I?
A strawberry
What is something that people keep in their trousers that their partners love to blow?
Money
You can go on top of me or underneath, and I always involve a bed. What am I?
A bunk bed
What gets wetter when things get steamy?
Steamboats.
What’s the biggest thing a man has in his trousers that a lady doesn’t want on her face?
Wrinkles
I absolutely love holding your buns all day. What am I?
A hair tie
What does every woman have that starts with a “v” that she can use to get what she wants?
Her voice
I come with a great pair, and people love to eat me. What am I?
A lobster
I’m small and hard, but holes love me. What am I?
A key
I have a long shaft. I always penetrate with the tip first, and I always come with a quiver. What am I?
Arrow
What can turn an “oooh” into an “Aaah”?
About three inches
You must blow me to play with me. What am I?
A balloon
I’m usually six inches long, roughly two inches wide, and everyone loves having me in their pants?
A $100 bill
I’m long, usually smooth, and have the word ‘cum’ in me. What am I?
A cuCUMber
I’m the most fun when you put me in small holes and wiggle me around. What am I?
A Q-tip
It doesn’t matter what room we are in. You can always spread me. What am I?
Butter
I’m usually around six inches long. I taste great in your mouth. Sometimes I’m salty, but I taste better with butter. What am I?
Corn on the cob
Take off my coat, then eat me. What am I?
A banana
What’s the maximum speed limit during sex?
68. Because when you hit 69, you’ll need to turn around!
You put me in your mouth and have endless fun blowing me. What am I?
Chewing gum
What goes in dry and hard but comes out wet and soft?
Pasta
I want to be inside you every day, and you can set me to vibrate for extra fun. What am I?
An electric toothbrush.
What’s the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer?
The taste
When I’m wet, I’m soft and gentle, but when I’m dry, I’m hard and rough. What am I?
Sponge
What do newly married couples get on their wedding day that’s long and sometimes hard?
A new last name
I’m hard and hairy on the outside but soft and wet on the inside. What’s inside me tastes great in your mouth. What am I?
A coconut
What is the difference between a woman’s G-spot and a dime?
Sometimes, men actually find a dime!
Sometimes, a finger goes inside me. You fiddle with me when you’re bored. The best man always has me first. What am I?
Your wedding band.
Set me to vibrate when you want some alone time. What am I?
A cell phone
What does a woman have two of that a cow has four of?
Legs
I can be long and hard or short and soft, But I always get the job done. What am I?
A candle
Why is a happy sex life like a good steak?
Because it’s rare!
How do you make five pounds of fat look good?
Put a nipple on it
I’m white, and you can put me in your mouth. Swirl me, spit me, but if you swallow, it may taste bitter. What am I?
Toothpaste
I can be short or long, I bring people great joy, and you can have multiple at the same time. What am I?
Tweets
I prevent any “little mistakes,” and I’m made of rubber. What am I?
Erasers
Most people love having me in their mouth first thing in the morning and last thing at night, and I’ll leave you feeling refreshed. What am I?
Toothbrush
Most people AND their significant others finger me on their first date. What am I?
A bowling ball
Also Read: Ultimate List of Riddles for Teens
Naughty Double Meaning Riddles
It’s time to lead the way to under the sheets!
I bring you the most joy when I’m really long and hard. What am I?
An education.
I fit perfectly between boobs, get longer when you pull on me and slide neatly into small holes. What am I?
A seatbelt
What’s the difference between amazing sex and this joke?
You actually get the joke
I’m short afterward, but long before being used. I’m always light, and I end in “ICK” What am I?
Wick
You do it. Your friends do it. Your parents do it. And sometimes, even your granny does it. What am I?
Facebook
I work with briefs, and I’m amazing when I’m using my mouth. What am I?
A lawyer
I can be seen at home or with a huge public screen. I begin with P and end in O-R-N. What am I?
Popcorn
You can use your hands OR your mouth to get me off. What am I?
Gloves
Cut me regularly or, if you want to be selfish, get someone to do it for you before it gets prickly. What am I?
The lawn
I asked my girlfriend for doggy-style today. Do you know what she did?
So she rubbed my face in pee
I’m a three-letter word that ends with the letters E-X, and I’m guaranteed to come every day?
Six
I’m a swinger with giant balls, and I’m perfect at helping to get erect. What am I?
A crane
Stick something long and hard inside me and see me get bigger until the job is done. What am I?
A tent
I’m usually all white, great at filling any hole, and I never let you swallow. What am I?
Your dentist
I come from nuts, I can be very sticky, and I taste amazing in your mouth. What am I?
Peanut butter
What’s long, hard, and tastes great in your mouth?
Pi
People love being inside me, and my shaft goes up and down every day. What am I?
An elevator
What’s long, pink, and makes women scream?
A Bridesmaid Dress
What is Snoop Dogg’s favorite gardening tool?
Hoes
Why is sex like a good steak?
Hours of prep work, just to be told, “Well done.”
If you can’t get me, you could always just use your hands to get the job done?
A fork
According to his best friend, what is every man’s favorite position?
Doggy Style
Women can’t get enough of me, and I rhyme with “sock.” What am I?
Talk
What four-letter word do some women love having inside them?
Baby
What happens when a lady gets something she really enjoys?
It makes her whole week.
You put your hands on me the first thing in the morning. You always play with me in bed before you get to sleep. I mostly live in your pants, and I am always in your mind. You cannot live without me. What am I?
A smartphone
I am mostly six inches long. I go in and out of your mouth in a rhythmic pattern. I am more comfortable when wet and very unpleasant when dry. I can be more fun when I vibrate. In the end, I make you happy and confident. Who am I?
A toothbrush
I am a five letters word starting with “P.” Women really love to get their hands on me. What am I?
Purse
Every time you blow me, I get bigger and tighter when you wrap your lips around my head. What am I?
A balloon
I come in different sizes, shapes, and colors. I occasionally drip. It can sometimes feel good when I am blown, and sometimes, it can be painful. What am I?
Nose
I am hairy on the outside and soft on the inside. I start with the letter “C” and end with the letter “T.” What am I?
Coconut
I am made of either latex or rubber. You wear me for protection every time you feel not so comfortable with what you are dipping yourself into. You use your fingers to get me on and pull me off. What am I?
Gloves
All men have it. Some have theirs longer than others, sometimes depending on where they come from. The Pope and most Catholic bishops rarely use theirs. Men usually give it to their wives once they are married. What am I?
Their last name
What four-letter word that ends in “k” means the same as intercourse?
Talk
Your finger fits right in it. You play with it when you’re bored. Once you’re married, you’re stuck with the same one forever. What is it?
A ring
Read More: 151 Romantic Love Riddles With Answers
Flirty Double Meaning Riddles
How about a little flirting with your partner before you actually get into the act?
You play with it at night in bed. You’re not allowed to fiddle with it and work. Only very special people are allowed to touch it. What is it?
A smartphone
What goes up, lets out a load, and then goes back down?
An elevator
I sometimes cause pain when I go in. I’ll fill your holes if you ask me to. I ask you to spit, not swallow. What am I?
A dentist
What does a dog do that you can step into?
Pants
What four-letter word ends in “it” and can be found at the bottom of bird cages?
Grit
What’s beautiful and natural but gets long and prickly if it isn’t trimmed regularly?
Grass
You stick your poles inside me. You tie me down to get me up. I get wet before you do. What am I?
A tent
I’m spread out before being eaten. Your tongue gets me off. Sometimes people lick my nuts. What am I?
Peanut butter
I assist with erections. Sometimes, giant balls hang from me. I’m known as a big swinger. What am I?
A crane
I’m the highlight of many dates. I’m especially responsive when you put your fingers deep inside me. What am I?
A bowling bowl
Name a word that starts with “f” and ends with “u-c-k”?
Firetruck!
What’s made of rubber, handed out at some schools, and exists to prevent mistakes?
Erasers
My business briefs. I’m a cunning linguist. I plead and plead for it regularly. What am I?
A lawyer
Who’s the most popular girl at the nudist colony?
The one who can eat the last donut!
Who’s the most popular guy at the nudist colony?
The guy who can carry a cup of coffee in each hand, plus a dozen donuts.
What is the difference between a woman’s G-spot and a quarter?
Men actually have a chance of finding a quarter when they search for it
You can’t taste it unless you undress it. What is it?
A banana
What is six inches long, two inches wide, and everyone goes crazy over?
A $100 bill
You get a lot of it if you’re important and successful; you get less when you’re just starting out. You sometimes do it with yourself if you need to, but it’s a lot better when it’s with other people. What is it?
Email
Over 1,000 people went down on me. I wasn’t a maiden for long. Something really big and hard ripped me open. What am I?
The Titanic
I grow in a bed, first white then red, and the plumper I get, the better women like me. What am I?
A strawberry
An expensive piece of tail, I come with a large “pair.” What am I?
A lobster
If you see me in bed, you whack me off. The bigger I am, the louder you scream. Seeing what’s between my hairy legs will make your skin crawl. What am I?
A spider
What’s the best part of your body to put into a pie?
Your teeth
If I miss, I hit your bush. It’s my job to stuff your box. When I come, it’s news. What am I?
A newspaper delivery person
Why is a happy sex life like a good steak?
It’s rare
I am dirty. People like to put their wood in me, but only Santa goes down on me. What am I?
A fireplace
I am sometimes short and sometimes long. Women generally demand my full attention. What am I?
Conversation
I am clean when you wash me and dirty when you don’t. People rub me and shake me sometimes. What am I?
Hands
Shaped like a stick, I am long and hard. I also have a head and a shaft. What am I?
Cane
I am sometimes long and sometimes short. I am usually warm. What am I?
Poop
I drip when you take me in your mouth. What am I?
Ice-cream
What goes up and never comes down?
Your age
I get laid in an alley. I often end up in the middle of your split. When you slip your finger inside me, I’m ready to roll. What am I?
A bowling Ball
How do you punish a naughty eyeball?
Give it fifty lashes
Which animal has the largest breasts?
The ZEBRA
A boy had sex using protection. A few weeks later, his girlfriend called and said she was pregnant. Her heart was broken. Nine months later, her water broke. What broke first?
The condom
Why did the New York Police Department fire all their gay detectives?
They kept blowing all their cases.
Why do women make better police officers than men?
Because they can bleed for a week and still not die.
Why are men like chocolate bars?
Because they are sweet, smooth, and they usually head right for your hips
Why won’t they allow elephants in public swimming pools?
They might let down their trunks!
How do you make a pool table laugh?
Put your hands down its pockets and tickle its balls!
Why do leprechauns giggle when they play soccer?
Cause the grass tickles their balls.
I am long. You move me around with your lips and tongue, I get wet with saliva, and I get sucked. What am I?
A straw
People come to visit me but usually don’t stay for very long. I can be clean but am more often than not very dirty. People usually reveal to me a part of themselves that they rarely show others. What am I?
A toilet
What 3-letter word starts with S and ends with X and has a vowel in the middle?
Six
Where do horny women, prostitutes, and cougars hang out before they go to the gym?
Dick’s sporting goods
What country in Asia has the largest semen-producing men and therefore has the greatest chances of having lots of children?
Cum-booty-a
Kids look forward to Santa for Christmas because he delivers and gives gifts to many. What was Santa’s job back when he was a naughty young guy and before he became a gift-giving and wish-granting legendary figure?
He was a pole dancer
I am sometimes long, sometimes short, sometimes hard, sometimes soft, and not only that, people love me, and if you squeeze me just right, then I’ll ooze out a little bit. What am I?
A banana
You’ll find me on a peak. I am sometimes small and sometimes big, sometimes pointy. What am I?
A nipple
What is the difference between what’s inside a man’s pants and what’s inside a woman’s pants?
The tag and how sizes are measured
What do men have in their pockets that women can’t get enough of, go crazy about, and love to get their hands on until it is fully spent?
A wallet full of cash
What do you call an unsinkable virgin?
A cherry float
I enjoy a soft blow, but other times I need a stronger blow in order to get all that goop to come out. What am I?
A nose
In addition to the obvious, how is a virgin forest like a virgin woman?
They are both bushy
What do you call a penis that claims he’s not a crook but turns out to be one?
Dick Nixon
What do an eggplant, a penis, celery, and cucumber have in common?
They all have the letter E
When people think of me, the word “hump” comes to mind. You can find me in a woman’s pants when they’re too tight. What am I?
Cameltoe
What would you put in the Christmas stocking of a horny woman who was naughty all year?
A sexy coal miner
A horny virgin walked into the grocery store and went straight to the fruit section. What was she looking for?
A popped cherry
You May Also Read: 60 Best Riddler Riddles With Solutions
Conclusion
Did you like this list of dirty double meaning riddles? How did your partner react when you asked them these naughty questions?
Let me know in the comments!