I was a very independent young woman. Stubborn almost. Then I got married. And if you’re anything like me, somewhere along the line I learned to lean (almost too much) on my spouse. I got into the habit of seeking his opinion and support so much, that it was almost to the point where I didn’t know how to make a decision anymore without his input.
Then he went away a couple of times on some extended mission trips. It forced me to remember and get back in touch with myself. It was good for me even though I missed him terribly. It made me have to make some choices and decisions again without him. Anything of great importance, of course, I always tried to contact him or take his thoughts and possible opinions into consideration – that’s what you do in a marriage relationship! But all the other decisions that needed to be made… I had to make them on my own.
It was really tough at first. I stressed myself out trying to make the exact right decision. Then I slowly started to learn that it was okay if I made a wrong choice here and there. I mean, that’s what most people have to do along life’s way, right? They have to learn from their mistakes and misfire a few times so that they can gain more wisdom and discernment.
I learned that I have a mind of my own. I mean, I always knew that – but I learned how to get back in touch with my own heart and mind. I think that’s important for women. Marriage shouldn’t be a pull and tug kind of thing, but it should be one where you feel comfortable if your husband is unavailable or not around to be able to make informed and strategic decisions for your household.
If you – like me – have come to rely on your spouse so much that you can’t say ‘yes’ or ‘no’ to anything without him; maybe it’s time that you re-learn how to make some small choices and decisions on your own again. Heaven forbid, something happen to him and you are at a complete loss of what to do in life!
You have something to add to you home, your marriage, and your life. It’s time to start seeing just what you can bring. I bet you’ll surprise yourself at just how much you have to offer.