It's Slammer Time

So if you donʼt know that Lindsay Lohan got sentenced to jail this past week, then it must mean you live in a cave and have absolutely no access to the outside world. In which case you canʼt read this and I safely say...move your ass out of the cave and invest in some damn wifi...but thatʼs besides the point...

Lindsay is supposed to check into Chateau Clink on July 20th to start serving a 90 day sentence, but how many days, hours or minutes will she actually serve. Being a super famous celebrity and all, she will most likely get 89 1/2 days off for good behavior. She has already served a whopping 83 minutes in the slammer for her last DUI stint. How did she ever manage?

Why is this? Why do celebrities get special treatment in everything, including jail time? What offense would a celebrity actually have to commit to warrant some “Hard Time”... Piss on an Oscar?

White collar crimes seem to land you in the pen for more than the length of a movie, just ask the lovely Martha Stewart. She served a 5 month stretch for some trading faux pas. Where as Nicole Richie served 82 minutes for driving drunk the wrong way down an L.A. freeway. Wesley Snipes was sentenced to 3 years for tax evasion, meanwhile R.Kelly got acquitted from 14 sexually related charges with a minor. Court sited, lack of evidence...THERE WAS A FREAKIN SEX TAPE! Paris Hilton did some hard time, 22 days for a D.U.I. Until she was released early for...wait for it...Crying to much! Tommy Lee did 4 months for spousal abuse, I have left milk in my fridge longer...back in my single days of course.

And letʼs not even talk about O.J...because mama will just have to POP OFF on somebody!

So what is it about being in the public eye that gets you a “Get out of jail free” card? Why can you get away with...well murder? Is it solely because they can afford the fancy lawyers? Do judges in Hollywood all have Botox to the brain?

I worry about the example it sets for young people, that real consequences donʼt exist. Go ahead, drive drunk, hit your bitch, snort some coke and then a little insider trading to top off your night. Sounds like a great night out to me, after all whatʼs the worse that could happen. I might have to pick up some garbage on the side of the road. Cool I can get Boy George's and Naomi Campbellʼs autographs while Iʼm there.

Body Cavity Search... Collins...

1 ounce X-Rated Fusion
1 ounce Vodka
1 ounce pineapple juice
1 ounce white grape/peach juice
2 ounces pink lemonade
Thawed raspberries
orange slice
sugar

Muddle raspberries with vodka. All all ingredients to shaker full of ice and shake well. Serve with or without ice. Dip orange slice in sugar and place on top for garnish. Please enjoy responsibly as you donʼt want end up as sell mates with Linsey...

About the Author A Bit About MOI...A Cocktail’ista.. I am the Author of the Award Winning Book,Libations of Life, A Girls Guide to Life One Cocktail at a Time. I am also a cocktail stylist, writer, humorist, wife, mother of 4, TV Junkie, shoe-aholic, boarder line George Clooney stalker..hmm what else... I am old enough to remember making “Mixed Tapes” from the radio...My fave vacation spot is anywhere with a beach bar...and when I grow up I want to be Carrie Bradshaw from Sex in the City...IT COULD HAPPEN! Life is Short...So be sure to wear FABULOUS Heels... Posted by Dee Brun in pop culture on July 12, 2010 More from this author  |  Author Website Follow Dee Brun on:  |