Junk in My Trunk (Week #5)

We have a “messy room”, as the kids like to call it.  We throw everything in there that needs to be donated, given away or otherwise disposed of.  There are piles of junk just waiting for the day that I can deal with it.

Problem is, I don’t even want to go near the messy room now, it is too overwhelming, too much junk that I have no idea where to start.

So I ignore it.

Turns out, I do that a lot.  Let things pile up, then think all I need is a bigger set of muscles to lug everything around with me.  I don’t look at it, I ignore it, but I feel the constant, nagging weight of it.

I have this inner trunk that I use to toss all the crap that I just don’t have the emotional wherewithal to tackle.

This trunk has gotten so heavy and so burdensome that I can’t even lift it in my mind.  I told my coach, Jennifer that my mind is playing tricks on me.  Surely I can lift the friggen imaginary trunk.  I just need bigger muscles.  Heave!  Ho! 

What I was really saying is that I felt weak.  I needed to be stronger emotionally to be able to carry the junk in the trunk.

However, Jennifer had a different - far better perspective for me to try on.  What if I unpacked the trunk?  Made it lighter?

Ooooohhhhhhhh --- yeah.  That might help.  Get rid of some stuff.  Lighten the load.  Stop working so hard.

What has happened is that everything in my life has been loaded into one big trunk.  I am no longer able to differentiate which area is really holding me back or weighing me down because I just chuck it all into my gloom pile.  A pile that I don’t want to look at, because who wants to be gloomy?  That’s no fun.

So we started to unpack that trunk.  What felt heavy, what did each area look and feel like.  I was able to separate the keepers from the chuckers. 

I found an area that was contained in a tattered, heavy trunk of its own which has tainted everything else.  Good news is, many areas are feeling lighter and lovely, bad news is - I have this whole other trunk I need to deal with.

The mind is amazing.  It will tell you where you need to go, what you need to do.  All we need to do is ask.  And trust.

Mind /  Soul.  Same diff.

Image by Windy_Sydney

About the Author Founder of EverythingMom.com Posted by Michelle in mom self esteem on August 25, 2010 More from this author  |  Author Website Follow Michelle on:  |

Comments  

 

0 # littlemissmocha 2010-08-25 06:14

Yes. YES. I too have so much physical "stuff" to purge that sometimes I think that is the source of my frustrations or angst. I'm buried in paper, stuff, you name it...much as I keep the day to day organized, I can't get to the other stuff.

But it's not a big leap to say that if things are piling up on me physically, chances are they might be in other areas too. Again, this Self Esteem post is making me think, and think.

Thanks Michelle, and Jennifer. My brain is enjoying coming along for the ride.

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0 # Michelle 2010-08-25 09:11

I'm with you, the physical stuff drives me bonkers. I begged my husband for one of those huge garbage things that sit on your driveway to just dump everything.

Thanks for riding with us!

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0 # nene 2010-08-26 04:55

Last night I went to the movies to see Eat Pray Love and I was touch at the scene that she put whatever was left of her life materials posessions and she said: "all my life is in a 1/4 room" and the man said: "do you know how many times a day I heard this? and the majority of the time people never come to get the staff back". This was a real revelation to me and definately it has a lot to do with the clutter in our life and this week disscusion. Why we think that we need that much staff and more importantly why it is so hard for us to clean our lives? I feel the same, cluter in my life and so much clutter in my inner life. I wish I have the magic on my to really breake free of them.

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0 # nene 2010-08-26 04:57

To claryfied my comment she put her staff (after she dediced to go for her year adventure)in a storaged room.

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0 # Michelle 2010-08-30 04:06

Turns out, unpacking this other trunk I've found changes everything.

I want to hide from unpacking it. I just want to wake up when it is over.

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0 # Lesley ONT 2010-08-30 06:59

Great post.
Lately I have been compelled to watch "Hoarders", not to gasp at the state of their homes -- but to understand what got them to that point, and why can't they get out.

Touch it once is my motto - reduce the incoming paper by recycling or shreding ASAP, your kitchen counter & mind will be uncluttered.

@lpurtell

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