The latest from our Heart and Soul

Start Your Own Journey { join our MomEsteem Group }

Join our Mom Esteem group to hear stories and experiences from our Life Coach, Jennifer Pernfuss and other moms just like you.

Week #10: Michelle's Journey

Let’s talk about hunger. Many of us have the nagging urge for more. More success, more food, more stuff, more acceptance, more love, more joy, more money, more, more, more...

We each have our means of feeding and masking our un-met desires. Many of us have heard and/or have succumbed to any number of these numbing traits:

• Shop for stuff that make us look better than we feel
• Drink something alcoholic so we can laugh or cry at everything and blame it on the booze
• Work like a dog so we feel like we are becoming successful, or something...
• Fight because dammit, we’re right, and we need to prove it, to someone or everyone
• Stuff ourselves with food, ‘cause golly it tastes good and we deserve it
• Ignore our responsibilities because we really have way to much to take care of anyhow, and we need a break, dammit.
• Pop some pills to numb any negative feelings
• Talk about how crazy everyone else is, because certainly WE are fine
• Hide out in Facebook, Twitter, TV, games etc because whatever is happening there MUST be better than what is happening in with 50 feet of ourselves
• Smoke something because it takes the edge off, even for a little while
• Get lost in a project that takes time and energy away from Everything
• Talks non-stop about anything and everything to avoid the silence of what IS
• Hide out in our bed and sleep from our exhaustion of trying to keep up with all this insanity

Certainly, I have experienced some of them. Have you?

All because we are hungry. Nom, nom, nom, nom -- we chow down on all those things that totally plug us up.

Hunger is uncomfortable. So we get restless, we take a peek at the smorgasbord of distraction and devour everything in sight to keep ourselves from feeling hungry.

Fact is, we simply don’t want to feel anything unpleasant. We look for the snappy, feel good quick fixes to whatever is happening that is making us feel blah.

Coming from this perspective, we will never, ever feel full. No matter how much we stuff ourselves full of tasty treats from that smorgasbord, we will still feel the pangs of hunger.

Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estes offers a different perspective.

She says ignore the smorgasbord.

Feel the hunger -- away from all the stuff to distract ourselves from what it is we really want. So, yes. Be uncomfortable. Sit there. Hungry. Don’t rush to fill ourselves up with junk.

Imagine, from within, what would nourish our souls vs grabbing what’s convenient. Follow our inner urges vs our outer indulgences. Differentiate our innate fulfillment from our external gratification.

Stop stuffing.

Clearing away all the stuff, we can begin to trust our deep desires. We can let go of our need to control Everything. A space begins to open that no longer feels hungry. It is a fertile, delicious ground prepared for magnificent presence. A space that is open and attuned to a deeper welcoming of what is meant to be.

Coming from a serial stuffer, as hungry as the emptiness feels right now, I am returning to my innate appetite vs grabbing what appears on the table in front of me.

 

About Mom Esteem Michelle Davies, the founder of EverythingMom, is on a 12 week Self-Esteem Journey with Life Coach, Jennifer Pernfuss. Mom Esteem was inspired by the Dove Movement for Self-Esteem. We invite you to join the journey by joining our Mom Esteem Group or starting your own journey by contacting Jennifer.