Last week’s challenge: Write, edit, and submit the article I proposed for YummyMummyClub.ca!
I did this! In fact, I think I had it done pretty early in the week — Wednesday or so? Looking back on it now, I did not have anyone else read this for feedback and critique, as I did for my TwiTip article, which may not have been the greatest idea. I guess I feel odd asking people to proofread my writing. I shouldn’t, because I’d help others if they needed it.
I still haven’t heard back from YMC about whether the article is acceptable or not, but that’s okay (and by ‘okay’ I mean I check my email fanatically every two hours for a response, and by ‘every two hours’ I mean every twenty minutes). So I did accomplish that challenge! I’d like to try to make a habit of submitting an article somewhere at least once every two weeks. We’ll see though. I sometimes get ahead of myself and have a hard time sticking to a commitment that’s scheduled only in my brain.
Another thing I have a hard time with right now is treating my husband fairly. He has been second fiddle since our daughter arrived, and while I think that’s to be somewhat expected with the intensity of the bond between mother and child, I also find that I am really short-tempered with him. I shouldn’t be. He’s an awesome, supportive guy.
It’s hard, though, to balance a baby and a marriage. I find that there are so many things we never discussed during the pregnancy that we just don’t see eye-to-eye on now. His personality is that of a teacher and guide; he wants to help Maia learn when they interact with one another. Mine is of a guardian and playmate; I want to bathe in her baby-ness and let her grow however she wants. We need to meet somewhere in the middle, and there are times when we have, but there are times when we haven’t. Times when we won’t.
Every time they’re together I hover. I watch. I wait for him to make one “misstep”, for her to give one little frustrated grunt, so I can sweep her up, hold her close to my chest, and revel in her. This is just so wrong, because I love him and I value him as a husband and a father. I really feel, though, like the rational part of my brain where that love and value resides is completely shadowed by the super-charged emotional part that’s screaming NO ONE KNOWS HOW TO INTERACT WITH MY BABY AS WELL AS I DO!
She’s not MY baby. She’s OUR baby. We made her together; we will raise her together. We are on the same team.
This week’s challenge: Appreciate my husband as a father, and be more trusting of his parenting decisions. Try to stop steaming at him for the things I think he’s doing wrong, and seek a middle ground.
I completely sympathize with your thoughts about needing to treat your husband fairly. I feel exactly the same way, and it’s nice to know I’m not the only one! Our son is 7 months old, and it’s a challenge to see my husband the same way I did before our son came along.