Potty Training Advice

A parent’s mind is a funny thing. I was so immersed in everything my first child did, and yet, as we hit each milestone again with our second child I find myself struggling to remember enough details to compare the two. (Perhaps this is the universe’s way of telling me to stop comparing?)

potty-training-advice This weekend my 19 month old toddled into the bathroom, then popped her head out to call me. I was a few steps behind her down the hall and by the time I got to her she was rolling up her shirt and determinedly trying to lift the lid of the toilet. I was so caught off guard that the first thought that went through my head was where I should start looking for potty training advice.

Of course, if I would just slow down and trust my instincts, I would know that the only resource I need, the only place I need turn for potty training advice is my own experience. After all, I’ve done this before. So here are some tips that I pulled from memory that may help you face this milestone calmly and without stress.

Plan Ahead:

From the time our son was very young, we would talk to him about going to the bathroom: what he would do and when, and how we washed up afterwards. It was a regular occurrence for him to see us in the bathroom; if you can get over the lack of privacy, it is one of the most helpful ways to teach a child to use the potty. Consider it at least. Our son knew that babies and very young children wore diapers, and that they wore them only until they learned to use the toilet. He knew as soon as he was a bit bigger, he would learn to use the potty and then we could shop for big boy underwear with pictures from his favourite stories.

How to start:

As soon as he started showing an interest, we bought him two little potties and put them in the bathrooms closest to where he spent most of his time. (A second potty is an extra expense, but we watched ahead of time for a sale and bought two for the price of one. And in a two-storey house, it’s the only way to go.)

Don’t be shy about asking for potty training advice. We found books and friends to be a great comfort, and very helpful.

Armed with tales we had heard of toddlers either refusing to sit on the potty, or refusing to get off, we came up with a couple of strategies. The first was to let him play with the potties, all the while still talking about what they were for, but to give him a chance to sit on them fully clothed until he was used to the idea and had his balance. Sometimes in the flurry of getting pants and diaper off and trying to rush a toddler to the potty, they can get overwhelmed and just refuse. Our second strategy was to place baskets full of small board books outside each bathroom. We told our son he would sit for three books and when we were done the books we would get washed up and be done until the next time. This had many benefits: he learned to sit still, there was a natural time to stop without a parent having to push the issue and he also was distracted enough that we had some lucky successes in the beginning. And…we read a lot of books!

And we began. We placed the potties in each bathroom and told our son we would be sitting on the potty after each meal and snack, and after rising from naps and in the morning. Our little tricks to help him feel comfortable and to keep him to a routine of using the potty seemed to help avoid some of the power struggles we had read about and helped build in lots of little wins. When it comes to encouraging small children, celebrations are a big part of motivation.

Relax:

In the beginning, we did consult books and ask friends for potty training advice. And we learned a great deal from doing so, but one of the most important things we learned is that every child, and every family, is different. We learned that experiences varied widely and there were a lot of right answers.

The reality is that there is no set age that stands out as the right time to start kids with potty training. Watch for signs of readiness like an interest in what family members are doing, a desire to have wet diapers changed often or a little one who imitates or asks to use a potty.

Never rush yourself or your child. As with any other milestone, each child will reach it in their own time. Pressure, struggles and guilt won’t get you anywhere and if anything may slow your child’s progress. If you can make learning the potty another fun and casual part of your child’s day, you will likely see more steps forward. And make sure you celebrate successes!

And who knows? Soon you’ll be such an expert that friends and family will be coming to you for potty training advice!

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About the Author

Writer, wife, mom, fueled by chocolate, coffee & laughter. Published in online media, nationally and internationally, my specialties include: freelance writing, community management, social media devouring, relationship building, and mildly obsessive editing. Community Manager for @EverythingMom. Founder of Mocha Creative Works - see www.mochacreativeworks.com for business/portfolio site.

Posted by Jen Taylor in behaviour on June 21, 2010

Potty Training Advice

Potty Training Advice

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