Momhacks: Teaching Silly Monkey Zen

My daughter walks a fine line between 'a normal four year old' and hyperactivity. A.D.D. runs rampant in my family, so I'm on the lookout for signs other than the ones she already exhibits, but even more so, I'm on the lookout for methods to help her learn to relax herself when she gets, for lack of a better word, hyper. Some things she's taught me - like that going to bed with books in her hand will guarantee that she stays in it, eventually lulling herself to sleep. Others, I've had to experiment to find, when I wasn't oft-repeating the phrase 'focus on what you intend to do'.

If you have a child who has a harder than average time mellowing, especially before bed, try one of these tips:

1. Yoga: You don't have to focus on the breathing aspect, or have your child chant 'ohm', but getting them to do a few standard poses - sun salute to standing tree pose, then triangle, downward dog, and finishing in lotus - may accidentally cause them to not only focus on breathing themselves, but also get some of their nervous energy out as they tip and wobble.
2. Art: And easel and paints or paper and crayons might be the ticket, but I go a little more out-there. Using eyeliner pencils, my daughter draws on my lower back - easily hidden, easily washed off with a baby wipe or makeup remover towelette. She will spent 20 minutes, completely silent except to ask for a different colour, breathing evenly and without any nervous energy. Of course, I kind of enjoy the moment to just lie there and get an accidental massage, as well.
3. Change your routine: Mine's one of those rare children who does Not, with a capital 'N' relax after a bath. It's like a shot of espresso for her. So we moved them to mid-day, instead. Is there anything in your child's bedtime routine that might be resetting all eight of their cylinders to 'go'?
4. Cereal: All of that reading I did taught me the importance of a satisfied tummy before bed. But standard snacks weren't cutting it, I didn't want to add something with too much sugar, and I was running out of foodstuffs. Then I locked in on my most favourite midnight snack, cereal with sliced bananas and soy milk. Never a hungry tummy, again.
5. Tell a story: Don't read a book (though obviously, we all know the importance of reading, too). Don't tell Goldilocks off the top of your heads. Alternate with your child, making up a story, from scratch. Not only will it get the silliness out, it also engages your child creatively in a way that books probably don't yet, and it will be - if they get into it as much as my daughter does - incredibly exhausting. Just remember to end it on a good note, since more dreams in children tend to manifest from their last pre-sleep thoughts.
6. Bake (and break) bread: Put away the mixer and the breadmaker. Get your child elbow deep in flour, kneading and rolling, dusting and twisting. It's meditative. After your bread is baked, have (decaf) tea with whipped butter and the bread you created together.
7. Do laundry: It's proven - folding a warm basket of laundry can make almost anyone sleepy. Put your child to work matching socks, finding underwear and even folding larger items (the ones that may envelop him or her in warm, dryer sheet-softened goodness, like bath sheets).
8. Go for a walk: An after-dinner walk can often be great for toddlers and young children, to get some fresh, tiring air, and to get the last of their built-up energy out before the bedtime routine begins. It's not so bad for mom and dad, too. Just try to stay away from really stimulating environments.
9. Cut the bedtime routine short: Did you know that too many steps in saying good night can make relaxation harder for some kids? The recommendation I've heard most is to limit it to 10 minutes, make most of that time when her bedtime tasks are done independently (the PJs, the teeth, etc), and to convene together at her bed when most of the time was up.
10. Mellow out: Have you ever had one of those days when you were just, like, Super Stressed, and it seemed like everyone else was, too? Did you blame the moon or some other cosmic alliance? Me, too! Really, our kids notice, even subconsciously, when we're stressed, full of nervous energy, or hyper. And then they sponge off of it. Again, subconsciously - I think. So, try finding zen yourself, and see how that affects your little monkey.

About the Author I blog, I parent, I have mood swings and talk too much. Posted by Terra in behaviour on August 24, 2010 More from this author  |  Author Website Follow Terra on:  |  |  |

Comments  

 

0 # littlemissmocha 2010-08-24 17:00

This is such a great article. It all makes perfect sense, yet is all presented in ways and through ideas that are fresh and new. Well done, and thanks for the tips I'll be remembering.

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